I am not ok. This is a lot. My stomach is tied up in knots and ya been for days. Headaches. Fatigue. Anxiety out the ass. Every symptom makes you scared that you’ve “got it.” First positive case at the hospital. My home state/town has exploded with cases over the weekend. Officially have a “stay-at-home” order in place for 30 days. My dad skipped town after only coming in yesterday because he was so scared and didn’t know what to do. My mom started watching my daughter today. My daughter has developed a worsening runny nose and a mild cough. She was in a good mood for my mom all day but was pissed off the rest of the night.

I don’t want to do this anymore. I want to die or say fuck it and go work in the ER.

Life is totally fucked right now except it’s not. I have income, I have childcare, I have food, I have toilet paper. I’m one of the lucky ones that has money and family to lean on. I can’t imagine what I would do if I were in a different situation.

The whole world is terrified and it will only get worse. Could really use a silver lining right about now